Sleep Train Without Crying: Is It Really Possible? 

 April 13, 2023

By  Mei Lele

Many people have confided that they are most afraid when their babies do not go to sleep by themselves but are always crying. Many mothers even have to stand holding their babies all night so that they can sleep well without any problems. If this situation persists, both you and your baby will experience certain effects both physically and mentally. That’s why you should know about the sleep train without crying. 

What is sleep train without crying?

sleep train without crying

Sleep training is the process of educating your infant to fall asleep without your assistance. That implies the baby is placed to bed tired but awake, and she falls asleep without being rocked, swung, hugged, fed, or shushed. 

Sleep training also teaches the baby how to go back to sleep when she wakes up throughout the night (since night waking is a normal part of the sleep cycle, even for adults).

Babies that have been sleep trained can sleep 9-12 hours at night. They'll feel better throughout the day, as will their parents, with more restful sleep, which can enhance the family's general quality of life. Little ones will still require naps during the day, but exhausted parents (particularly women suffering from pregnancy insomnia) will be able to get more restorative sleep.

In other words, this method takes the opposite approach to the crying it out method and therefore requires the parent to soothe, comfort, pat, or cuddle the baby as soon as the baby starts to cry. The idea is to not let the baby cry constantly and help the baby go back to sleep on its own.

How long does it take for sleep training without tears to work?

sleep train without crying

This method allows you to spend more time with your child. Babies will gradually get used to not having parents around during sleep: do not hold the baby for too long, nor breastfeed as soon as the baby is uncomfortable and wants to cry. 

But this process requires a lot of patience because, for the baby not to cry or cry for too long, you must find a way to withdraw gradually. You should remember that the result you expect from this method is that your baby will fall asleep on his own without your help. So be patient, as it can take one to three months for you and your child to get used to this method.

This gentle and comfortable sleeping method can take some effort and consistency to show you the results you want. And before you prepare to embark on this method, you still need to know its pros and cons.

The advantages of sleep training without crying

sleep train without crying
  • This is an effective method of sleeping for babies who need more help to fall asleep than others.
  • It is a gentler approach to sleep training.
  • It is effective in creating a softer and more positive bedtime image for the baby.
  • It's great for creating a strong bond between you and your little one.

This is considered a method of gently training the baby to sleep because the baby hardly or cries very little, while the parent's job of lulling the baby to sleep is also increasingly lighter.

Sleep training without crying also helps the baby sleep better and more. It also helps babies wake up less often in the middle of the night, if any, just a little cuddle for a few minutes as part of their bedtime routine and they're back to sleep right away.

The disadvantages of sleep training without crying

sleep train without crying
  • It may require you to constantly check on your baby, which means you will sleep less.
  • It can make your baby more clingy.
  • It may take longer for you to implement the method and see the results.

Not as drastic as other methods of letting your baby cry until they stop on their own. That means your baby won't be able to stop relying on you to sleep right away, but if you get over the difficulties of the early stages, everything will go in the direction you want.

The method of sleep training without crying you can try

There are many methods that have been applied to help babies sleep better on their own, and the methods we have listed below are believed to be the most effective and safe.

Fading method

sleep train without crying

This is a gentle sleep training method because babies hardly cry, or cry briefly because parents will help the baby to fall asleep and slowly leave after the baby has fallen asleep. This means that the parent's role in lulling the baby to sleep will be diminished over time and the child will learn to lull himself to sleep.

The Fading method is applied to children from 5 months old and up and lasts until the child enters kindergarten. But, if the father wants, you can still apply from when the baby is only a few weeks old.


  • With the Fading sleep training method, parents can balance 2 two factors: Parents will not drastically avoid caring when the baby is fussy. At the same time, parents also support children to a moderate extent.


  • This is a time-consuming and persistent method, you will often feel tired and frustrated because your baby won't sleep on his own.

The Chairman's Method

sleep train without crying

This is a very slow method of sleep training and requires a lot of discipline with your baby. You are getting ready to put the baby to sleep, but instead of leaving the room, You must sit on a chair next to your baby's bed or crib. When the baby sleeps, you leave the room, but every time he wakes up, you sit down on the chair until he falls asleep on his own. Every night, his parents moved the chair farther and farther until he was out of the room.


  • This method will help parents feel less stressed and anxious when watching their baby sleep. You can still do some personal things you want while your baby sleeps.


  • The baby will cry a lot which can affect the mother's psyche because the mother is sitting right there watching the baby cry and can't hold back the child's famous crying.
  • Some sleep experts also recommend this method is less effective and can have more serious consequences. That's because a mother sitting right next to her baby but not interacting with him at all can make him so irritated and cry so much that he can't calm down.

Co-sleeping method

sleep train without crying

Many people say that letting your baby sleep with you is not good, they make it harder for them to fall asleep on their own. However, It's completely normal and there's nothing wrong with letting your baby sleep in the same room as you. This not only helps the baby feel safer, and more secure knowing that you are right next to him, but also makes it easier for the baby to latch on to the mother.

But if you're going to teach your baby to sleep, make sure he has a separate sleeping place in your room. Let your baby sleep soundly in his crib/crib.


  • This method connects you and your baby in the best way, feeling each breath when lying next to your baby, and if you have a crib, you will also observe your baby at the closest distance.


  • This method will bring the lowest efficiency, the child depends a lot on your presence.

Pick up and Put Down Method

sleep train without crying

For babies under 7 months old, experts recommend that mothers use the method of sleeping in the same room, but let the baby sleep more on his own than help him. You can stand by your baby's crib and crib and sing lullabies, pat, or rub his back to reassure him.

If the baby only cries at a small, moderate level, the mother should let the baby stop on his own. But the mother can pick up the baby to comfort him when he cries a lot, crying uncontrollably. After reassuring and soothing the baby, the mother put the baby down again before the baby fell asleep. The mother's work at that time was to calm the baby down and the baby's work was to sleep.


  • You won't have to endure the discomfort of letting your baby cry for too long, plus this method is also a great way to bond with you but not let them stay with you all night long.


  • This method only really works for babies under six months. For babies seven months and older, the presence of the mother can make the baby more fussy and irritable, and the act of picking up and then putting him down to calm him may stimulate the baby to become more irritable.
  • This method requires a lot of patience because it will take longer for your baby to fall asleep on his own than methods like crying it out...

There is no perfect method of training children to fall asleep on their own, parents need to choose which method is right for their child and family, and then consistently implement it to achieve its effectiveness as desired. 

Tips for gentle sleep training

Besides using a specific method, you can also keep in mind helpful tips to make the process more efficient and gentle.

sleep train without crying

Be consistent

Make sure you're consistent with your method and adjust your baby's nap schedule. This can help your baby understand that now it's bedtime and he has to sleep.

When you start with any kind of sleep training method, things often seem dire at first. So stick with it for at least a week or two. If after that time there is still no improvement, then you should change to another method. If you are too tired, ask for help from relatives or friends, and everything will become easier and maybe more effective.

Patience and consistency are key. Repeat the same action each time you put your baby to bed until she gets used to and learns independent and healthy sleep habits. Consistency is the key to making sure you get the results you want.

Don't delay bedtime

Parents often think that a late afternoon nap should not be given to the baby because it can interfere with the baby's sleep at night. On the other hand, it can sometimes do the opposite and your child may not sleep at night because he may be too tired. Therefore, make sure that if your baby wants to go to sleep, let him sleep.

Record your child's sleeping habits

sleep train without crying

This can help you understand your child's sleep habits better - what time he sleeps, what causes him to wake up, etc. Make a note of it all to see what might be affecting his sleep, It offers solutions and necessary changes to help your baby sleep better.

Stop responding to sounds when the baby is close to sleep

Sometimes babies who are not ready for sleep can also make sounds with their parents. And this will make you forget to sleep. At the same time, the sound the baby makes is not always the real cry of the baby. Therefore, parents should also stand outside to observe whether the child is crying or not. This avoids waking the child up in the middle of deep sleep. At the same time, do not give children the habit of taking advantage of that to avoid going to bed early.

Follow a process

Parents sometimes set up a schedule of activities before bed. And repeating them daily also helps create helpful sleep habits for your baby. Because at this time, the child's body and brain have memorized these activities in the subconscious. When this activity is done, the child's body will automatically remind him to do the next activity.

Create a comfortable environment

Comfortable sleeping space is key and if you know how to "disguise" your baby can sleep well during the day and at night. Pay attention to both room temperature and noise, especially if your child is sensitive to noise. Comfortable sleeping space will encourage your baby to sleep more and sleep better.

Understanding Cues

sleep train without crying

You need to understand and capture the cues from your baby because this will help you stabilize your baby's sleep during the night. You may notice a change in your baby's behavior or gestures. Every baby is different and, therefore, may show different signs.

Say comforting words to your child

Come up with a comforting phrase or saying to say to your child every time you put him to bed. Your child will get used to it that every time he hears that phrase or sentence from you, he realizes it's time to go to sleep.

Understanding your baby's sleep

Find out and observe how long your baby will usually sleep depending on their age and remember that before your baby turns 1 year old it is completely normal for your baby to wake up in the middle of the night.


sleep train without crying

This topic has received a lot of attention from everyone, parents have a lot of questions about sleep training without crying. After reading and synthesizing from many sources, we will help you answer in a way which is easiest to understand.

At what age can a baby self soothe?

Because their sleep patterns are erratic and they need to eat regularly to gain weight, newborns are not normally capable of self-soothing, and urging them to do so can be damaging. Some newborns can self-soothe by the age of three or four months.

Does sleep training cause psychological damage?

You do not need to worry because there are no cases of psychological problems due to sleep training now. You just need to try to follow the right process, not because you have not seen the results but change so quickly that your child does not have time to adapt.

How long does it take to train a child to sleep gently?

Within 7 to 10 days, most families see a beneficial shift in their baby's (or toddler's) sleep patterns. That equates to less than two weeks. Families that don't notice benefits in the first few weeks should reconsider their approach to The Shuffle.

Will my baby have no more sleep problems after successful sleep training?

No one can sleep through the night completely. We tend to wake up or turn around or sometimes have to go to the toilet "to deal with sadness". Similarly, your baby will wake up, lean over, and may cry, even after being put to sleep. It's a natural part of growing up.

But how your baby copes and learns to go back to sleep on his own is what matters. If your baby can do this, it means you have successfully trained your baby to sleep.

If I let my baby cry until he falls asleep, will he hate me?

A study conducted by scientists at Flinders University in Australia found that letting your baby cry until he fell asleep on his own did not affect the relationship between you and your baby. Guilt comes naturally. It's hard not to feel guilty at all when you let your baby cry until he sleeps like that. But no matter how controversial, this is still one of the effective ways to establish a sleeping habit for your baby.

Sleep Train Without Crying


The method of sleep training without crying will be helpful for parents in training their children to sleep. At the same time, this method also creates a more intimate connection between parents and children. Help children receive more warmth from parents. And help parents better understand the activities, status, and desires of their children. We wish parents success with this method.

Mei Lele

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